don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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