I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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