I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
