No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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