redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
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