A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize
