I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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