Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
