I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize