Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
