Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
