I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
