Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize