Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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