Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
