I'm really into asian looking animals
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
