Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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