I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Randomize
