OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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