God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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