Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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