best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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