doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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