I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
