Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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