i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
