Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize