How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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