I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
