I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
