508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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