New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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