the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
