kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
