Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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