Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize