It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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