Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
