is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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