C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I will be naked everywhere
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize