Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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