i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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