yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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