Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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