Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
