you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
