Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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