4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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