he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
