you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
