Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
